Obama Donation Saves ‘The View’

FINALLY!

As had been said, many times in the 2000’s, thank God for Barack Hussain Obama.

“Thanks everyone, salaam alechiem. Hey, anyone seen Limbaugh lately?”

ABC television has had a very public problem lately with one of it’s top daytime shows, “The View.”  After losing Meghan McCain as their conservative Republican voice, followed by Joy Behar and Whoopi Goldberg’s problems with Kyle Rittenhouse and his lawsuits, the show was ready for cancellation.

Now, that’s happily not the case.  President Obama and his wife Michelle were following the story closely, and injected nearly three hundred million dollars into ABC’s coffers, specifically earmarked to save the daily hyena display.

No one is exactly sure where such a bountiful harvest of sawbucks came from, but family replacement gynecologist Sandy Batt had a few ideas.

“A lot of their fortune comes from Obamacare payments.  I know that’s money coming in every month.  Then there’s the cash that got ‘lost’ that was sent to Iran at 3 in the morning on pallets.  Because that’s totally a realistic way to send cash.  And, you know, we always…send…cash.”

“I actually intercepted it and used it all for some blow. That was a wild weekend.”

There are also funds coming in from both the Obama’s writing careers as well as their ongoing deal with streaming giant Netflix.  And also lemonade.  Malia has a lemonade stand.  She is 23 years old.

The pair and ABC executives are currently embroiled in talks to save the beleaguered program.  Will it work?

We certainly hope so.  There’s not much work at ten-forward for Whoopi anymore.  A good space bartender is hard to find.

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