Malia Obama Deported From UK After Third Arrest

Malia Obama left the US shortly after the end of her sophomore year at Harvard to get a fresh start away from the influences that turn her into a criminal. Unfortunately for the well-meaning young woman, it wasn’t in the cards.

Once a thief, always a thief. Her temporary student visa in the UK, issued while she attends Oxford, has been revoked and she’s been sent home on the first flight out of Heathrow.

According to the locals, Malia was nothing but trouble. Sandy Batt, who runs a small fresh oyster cart on the Thames, says Malia was an unwelcome guest from the start:

She was a pain in me ass she was. Busted for tresspassing for scaling London Tower, busted for jumping the turnstiles at King’s Cross and trying to get to track 9 3/4. Busted for that topless gring on the Buckingham Palce guard. Nothing but trouble.

The Brits say they’re not looking to stir the pot and prosecute anyone, but they want her gone. She will, most likely, return to a life of crime at Harvard, where she’s already been banned from the library for stealing.

Malia Obama Stole Priceless Artifacts From The Harvard University Library

The Obama’s, of course, deny the whole thing. They say Malia never went, and this whole thing is just a story somebody made up to see how many people read all the way to the end.

Considering what happened in 2016 and January 6, 2021, the answer would be…not many.

God bless America.

About Flagg Eagleton-Patriot 72 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.

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