Sasha in Bad Shape After Birthday Arrest


Sasha Obama is a clear cut case of partying way past her bedtime.

The trouble-laden twenty-year old trickster was photographed this last weekend in terrible emaciated condition after being released from her holding cell at the Queeftown, Virginia, G.W.Bush Prison facility.

Pictured: a prison cell set aside only for Obama females and hyenas.

Shown boogying deftly out of the gate to be picked up by ersatz boyfriend and Ghostbusters star Ernie Hudson, Obama waved away photographers and reporters alike and sped off towards the local Dave and Busters entertainment facility to have a few drinks and play “House of the Dead.”

Our entertainment and Obama Eye On the Street reporter, Joe Barron, was there, hiding behind an out-of-order Guitar Hero machine.

“As anyone can plainly see with their eyes, Sasha appears to have lost quite a bit of weight, thanks to her habits and stay in the pokey.  Her arms look like little black spaghetti noodles that have been cooked in boiling urine.”

The mini Manchurian muskrat was celebrating her June tenth birthday three months late at the “Big Asss Tittays” club in the city of Porky Pants, when she was arrested for climbing up an outside telephone pole to whip frozen peas at passerby, drunk and disorderly conduct, and driving with airbags fully deployed.  An assault charge was added later by arresting officer Clete Torris, who was punched repeatedly in the mangina.

“The mangina is a sacred region of the body. Jesus’s had glitter!”

Sasha’s infamous father Barack Coltrane Obama had the charges dropped after a few well-placed phone calls to the authorities.  The department also walked away with suspicious brand new gold pussy hats and diamond rings.

“She’s moved over to the Galaga machine,” Barron added.  “And she’s just wailing on the ‘fire’ button like crazy.  She’s already got the third place high score.  I think she’s going to beat the number one, some dickhead with the initials ‘DIK.”

What an interesting development.

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