Obama Fires Back – ‘I Dare You to Indict Me’

HERE WE GO!

Very recently, President Trump put out a call for his rival and predecessor Barack Obama to be inducted by the justice department, a request that came as a shock to even his own party.

GOP committees wouldn’t even consider it and privately asked for a slowing of the rhetoric, according to capitol insiders.

Gym Jordan actually stopped watching torture porn for a full five minutes to weigh on.

Last night, Obama took to the air on CNN to fire back at the paranoid schizophrenic plumpster, dismissing his charges as “absurd fantasy” and suggested Trump be immediately removed for being very obviously too mentally ill to continue in office.

Network pundit Joe Barron visibly shook with liberal glee as the far superior leader cut loose.

“Donald, I goddamn dare you to indict me.  For any of the imaginary crimes you think exist.  ‘Obamagate?’  What is that?  You don’t even know, do you, you fat old covid-burping chimpytard.  Your entire Presidency is skating off of everything I did.  Boy, you’re so jealous you’re shoe-polishing your dick.  Your cult klan rallies are like Homestyle Buffets on Sundays – all manner of old people puking in their cars on the way home.  But sure, I’m the one at fault for you literally killing off citizens and bitching at the military.  Okay.  Indict me, hooker drain.  Then go on and try to convince your legion of morons to give you their last vote.  Dickslap.”

Obama’s fiery outburst drew a record number of viewers to CNN while rival elderly entertainment networks Fox and OAN broadcast the morbidly obese President taking yet another stab at second grade English at a rally in Iowa.  You could count the number of darker faces in the crowd on zero fingers.

No, Jethro, it doesn’t count that you saw the Samuel Jackson “Shaft” movie twice.

Since it’s never been made anywhere near clear what “Obamagate” is supposed to be about and it’s been proven conclusively that the FBI did investigate the Trump 2016 campaign because Russian operatives had influenced it and that’s their job, it’s unlikely that any indictments will be issued.

But maybe the handicapped oatmeal blimp can scribble one out with his sharpie.

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