Obama, Gore, To Offer Iran New Deal

UNBELIEVABLE!

During Barack Obama’s tenure in the White House, a deal with the nation of Iran was carefully constructed in order to keep the rogue regime from coming closer to having nuclear weapon capability.  Including reduced sanctions, the freeing of their own money from American banks, and other incentives, the deal would have pushed Iran’s ambitions back at least a decade and was working just fine until President Trump, like everything else he touches, ruined it.

This is what happened when Trump tried to grow Sea Monkeys.

Now, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo has been written off after an attempt to have countries join in sanctions required by the agreement Trump cancelled, receiving only laughter as aid while his administration has embarrassed us on the world stage.  Luckily, Barack Obama and Al Gore are at the ready to swoop in like the Justice League to save the world.

According to International Man of Mystery Joe Barron, Obama and Gore together have a much better reputation of actually getting anything done, and are, together, nearly an order of magnitude smarter than the current morbidly obese parade balloon occupying the oval office.

“Thankfully, two real negotiators have come up with a plan to save us from a nuclear holocaust.  They will be flying to Iran next week, with the blessings of Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Congress, and have more to offer the saucy theocracy than before.  For example, besides putting the previous conditions back into play, Iran will be offered a $100.00 Dave and Busters play card, usable at any of their locations in North America.  They will also be given a box of Trump wine to feed to their goats, and a gift certificate for Melania Trump’s services.  It’s really a deal sure to help America, it’s people, and it’s allies.”

The mullahs will also enjoy a display of erotic parkour, courtesy of Spicy Sean Spicer.

Will Obama and Gore’s minstrations help to secure our country where Donald Trump’s failures to act in even the least retarded fashion have failed?  It’s a safe bet.  It looks like the adults have finally entered the room.

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