A harmless attempt at a little locker room humor has cost two Marine Sergeants their careers this week, after a panel of their superior officers discovered a Facebook post they wrote and shared referring to former First lady Michelle Obama as “A man.” The pair were court martialed and sent packing with dishonorable discharges, ensuring that they would find further difficulty in civilian life.
Sgts. Joe Barron and Sanders Batt of the 4th battalion Marine unit known as “The Rolling Blueballs” stationed in Baggerpeen, Thailand to monitor Fox personality Sean Hannity during his frequent sexual vacations, were stripped of their ranks and sent packing when the post was flagged by the social media giant as “hate speech.” Both the, now bums, are ardent supporters of President Trump.
The firings represent the first salvo in the military’s new fight against morons and idiots serving in any position with responsibility. Marine General Wade Eiling says censors and court monitors are concentrating on the Facebook and Twitter accounts of all identified Trump throwbacks who believe stale old gaybashing attempts from jackasses stuck in comedic radio shows from the 50s are funny.
“These officers are, frankly, just embarrassments we’d like to throw in the trash where they belong. A fat-faced pillow humping incel who thinks ‘She’s a MAN!’ makes them look any smarter than Melania Trump trying to read a Dr. Seuss book isn’t fit to be called a Marine. We bid them goodbye, and sincerely hope they end up mopping up dog urine from the loading dock of a Hobby Lobby in the future. Semper F*ck You, boys.”
Both Barron and Batt have refused to apologize for their life-destroying gag, and blame their superiors for violating the first amendment rights they basically gave up when they joined the corps. Their families have abandoned them and forced both fallen heroes to live in drainage ditches eating worms and discarded cigarette packages to survive.