Another year has passed, and with it, another celebration of life for America’s 44th President Barack Obama. At the landmark age of 59, the Democratic hero partied with great aplomb at his newly-purchased 40-room mansion with family, friends, and more than a few celebrities. But some photographs of the suaree are going viral across social media, and they have a large contingent of Trump supporters angrier than Merle Haggard at the Apollo theater.
The photos, taken by paparazzi reporters and TMZ drones, show images of large effigy figures of President Donald Trump, tied to poles and set ablaze, with what appear to be party guests dancing and cavorting around their bases happily. Additional images revealed one of the facility’s tennis courts papered with “Trump 2020” campaign posters, covered with partygoers wantonly urinating on the commander-in-chief’s smiling mentally-handicapped face. On the western flank of the property, signs directed attendees to a “Whore-Dunking Booth”, festooned with accompanying photos of Melania Trump and baseballs.
Guest and assistant butler of the estate Joe Barron, told media sources that it was all done in a “party atmosphere” to celebrate the love of real Americans for a real President.
“This party is off the hook, yo. And it only gets better when we can let loose and give that moron Trump the shitshow he deserves. We have Taylor Swift on the main stage dedicating Queen’s ‘Fat Bottomed Girls’ to His Morbidly Obese Eminence, and I think I saw Whoopi Goldberg over in the Boom Boom Room tearing open one of those gay Trump teddy bears and stuffing it with chimichangas. Pretty hilarious. We’re all being extremely careful, wearing masks and distancing so we don’t come down with the Trump Plague. We’re making Birthdays Great Again. Happy 59th, Obama! Hey. Is that Lindsey Graham in RuPaul’s Tickle Chair over there?”
The party reportedly continued to rage until early the next morning, leaving dozens of passed-out revelers snoring peacefully on ashen husks of burned up Trump balloons. The only one missing was Mitt Romney, who couldn’t enter the property due to a spill of Jolt Cola in front of the entrance gate.