Barack Obama is off the rails. After a week of screaming “Impeach!” at the top of his lungs, he was caught on film punching what one bystander called a “very young white girl.”
Obama’s spokesman, Art Tubolls, says the incident is being exaggerated:
“This girl just shows up at his office demanding he do something about the environment. He’s…not the president anymore. He has no actual power. She got more and more in his face until he lost it. One source says she even hit him first.”
The punch is being called “the shot heard ’round the world,” and will most likely lead to Obama having to resign the next time he’s elected to something. All-in-all, it doesn’t look good for the Obama legacy.
Malia and Sasha, on vacation with their biological father, N’daku M’ndakata Johnson — of the Sudanese Johnsons — say they are appalled at the behavior of their former parent and expressed their joy at having found their real dad.
Michelle wasn’t available for comment, but sources close to the family say Barack is in for a good ol’ fashioned whooping when she catches up with him.
The girl hasn’t filed charges yet but has hired a lawyer to explore her options.